The sick child turmoil

Poor punkin. I knew on Thursday night when she kept putting her head on my shoulder that a sickness was creeping in. And sure enough, by the end of the night her little head was hot and she wouldn’t let me set her down for a second. And by the third dirty diaper I knew things were not good.

I try hard to balance being a good employee and being a good mom. But this time it seemed like I was just going to have to make a choice and let somebody down. I chose work. Sorry coworkers. Normally I don’t feel too bad staying home with my sick child. It’s my job right? But my other job really needs me on Fridays. Not that I’m so spectacular, but it’s an unusually busy day around there and we all need to pitch in.

I debated about it all night. What if I go in for the first half of the day and Steve watches Ella then I’ll come home to watch her at 11? Or what if I take her to the sitter’s and just have her call me if she’s not feeling well? Afterall, I don’t know that she’s going to be sick tomorrow for sure. Maybe it’s just her teeth. It’s so hard telling when they can’t tell you.

When I woke up in the morning and felt her little burning forehead I just felt like there was no way to leave her. Steve would take good care of her, but when kids are sick, they want their mom.

So, I stayed home and she was weepy and sick acting and I gave her some motrin, and before I knew it, she’s running around like usual. Pushing her babydoll in her stroller. Cutting up her plastic pizza. Trying to eat crayons. Hmmm. Now what? Do I go to work? That would mean I need to either take her to the sitter’s or have Steve miss work to stay with her. I decide taking her to the sitter’s is a bad idea. There are other kids there and maybe she’s contagious.

As the morning goes on she has occasional flashes of being sick. Like she forgets because she’s so busy contemplating which part of the cat she’s going to yank on, then suddenly a sad look comes over her and she runs to me for comfort. Her shirt repeatedly is drenched with drool too, which makes me think her teeth are the culprit. Whatever it is, it sucks.

I’m so glad to be there for her while she’s sick, but I keep thinking of how it’s a day I could have taken off work when the sun is shining and I could be playing with her at the park or with her at the zoo … Or we could have slept past 5:45 instead of me getting up to make work arrangements. And I wouldn’t feel guilty all day for being a bad employee and all the people scrambling to figure out how to do my Friday work. Or guilty that I have to actually consider NOT staying home with my sick child!

Lately the weather is really making me mad too. It’s been so sporadic. Mainly sunny and beautiful while I’m at work, then I race to the sitter’s to get Ella so I can get her home to take her outside. And then it turns grey and starts raining. Have I mentioned how great the outdoors is when you have a toddler that loves to run and play and climb and is tired of all the indoor toys?

Aaah, well, I’m glad I stayed home with Ella. And she’s all better now. We had a nice afternoon Saturday at Chic -Fil A, eating lunch with her cousins and playing in the playroom they have. And when we got home the sun came out and we got to play a little bit outside. Just a little though. It’s my Saturday night to work. Tomorrow we’ll have all day together though, but just guess what the forecast is. 50s. And rain.